【一切的失敗和不足,都是最美好的安排】
All Failures & Lacks Are The Best Things to Happen to Us
三個月前,收到來自台灣客人的這封電郵時,開心和心酸交織著在心裡。
開心,因為這是一年前通過Zoom視訊的客人。他居然在我們看八字的一週年,特地寫了封感謝函給我,真有心!
心酸,因為他寫在電郵裡的低落心情,我完完全全明白。
他的經歷,是我的曾經。我當初也是很難,很久才能走出來。
有一回,我為一位芳華正茂的女子批八字時,她很用心的寫下我說的話。
論寫筆記的完整,她是我客人當中的佼佼者。
寫到一半,我注意到她的右手開始微微顫抖。我以為是空調的風太大了,冷到她,便問她要不要披巾。
她說,是她的焦慮症發作。
「我沒在兇你,也沒對你嚴厲,你為何突然焦慮?」
「我.....打從今年疫情打亂了我的計畫,我就一直很焦慮。我覺得我很沒用,同學們都前進了,只有我現在什麼都不是,亂糟糟的。我就一直很緊張,萬一我一直都是這樣,怎麼辦?」
說著,她眼眶一紅,眼淚像斷了線的珍珠鏈似的灑下來。
我的媽呀!是我的樣子長得很催淚,還是我的聲音聽起來很虐心?怎麼客人,不分男女老少,東南西北,看到我好像都很容易哭?
我抓起一張紙巾遞給她。
「所以,我不是來了嗎?你來找我,就是要問個明路,而你很幸運那麼快就看到我啦!你看你的筆記寫得多工整,多齊全。我很多客人都不如你啊!我今天的工作,就是來給你答案的。我沒有把握,也不會接你這份差事。我接了,就代表還可以補救。你照著我的指示去做,一定柳暗花明又一村。」
又另一回,一位四十多歲的媽媽請我看兒子的八字。
我在批著八字時,這位媽媽點頭認同,然後就聲淚俱下。
我轉頭看著她沈默不語的先生。我說錯了什麼嗎?太太哭成淚人,你怎麼連紙巾也不拿給她啊?
「我是個沒有用的母親,很不稱職的母親。我沒有辦法教好孩子。我很愛他,可是很多時候我都不知道要怎麼做,我就會對他發脾氣,說狠話,過後我又後悔。我忍下來,可是後來還是會一樣!」
我沒打斷她,等她的哭聲逐漸小聲後,我柔柔的說:「我來啦!我坐在你前面了。你已經看到我,就是有辦法了。你知道你自己不行,會去找辦法,就代表你願意去學習做個好媽媽啊!」
我把紙巾遞給她,再說:「不要哭了,要不然,別人看了以為是我不要借你錢,才把你弄得那麼傷心。」
曾幾何時,我們都會以外在所擁有的,來定義自己的人生是否值得自己喜歡。
從原生家庭、樣貌、健康、身型、智力、天賦等,到後來的學歷、友情、事業、財富、婚姻、子女......
哪一樣沒有,而偏偏是我們最想要的,我們就會認定自己失敗的一塌糊塗。
我認為這就是普通教育最大的問題所在。父母老師都是這樣把我們「分門別類」的。值不值得父母疼愛或向親朋戚友炫耀,也離不開那幾點。
久而久之,我們也只會以「成功」來定義自己是否有價值,甚至來衡量自己是否有活下去的勇氣。
我比較喜歡佛法的定義。我們每個人都是一尊佛,六道眾生皆有佛性,只因一時的迷,因此墮落在苦輪不停的輪迴。
可正因為我們有佛性,我們都有無窮無盡的可能。每個人的內在有著很強大的力量,等著我們遇到明師後,去發掘、探索和了解。
而這天生俱來的力量,就是你改命立命的資本。
如果人生順風順水,我們永遠不會想要出離,誤把人間當極樂,所以一定要有苦,我們才會意識到,為什麼我們會在這鬼地方?要怎麼樣才可以離開這鬼地方去到極樂?
反過來,我們都應該感恩自己遇到的挫折,因為從這些苦中,我們才能生出智慧。
沒有一個八字是完美的。一切的失敗和不足,都是最美好的安排,如此你才會有出離心,返本歸源。
_______________________
3 months ago, when I received this email from my Taiwan client, there was this feeling of bittersweetness.
I was happy because this was the client I did a Zoom consultation last June. He sent me this email on the one-year anniversary date of our Zoom call, to express his gratitude. How sweet!
On the other hand, I could relate to the emotional turmoil he felt at that point in his life.
His experience was my past. It also took me a very long time to walk out from my gloominess.
Once, I analysed the Bazi of a very young lady. She was meticulously jotting down notes as I spoke.
Her detailed note-taking skills easily took the top place among my clients.
Halfway through, I noticed her right hand was trembling slightly. I thought it was due to the cold draft from the air conditioning, so I asked if she needed a shawl.
She replied that it was her anxiety disorder acting up.
“I was not fierce or strict with you. What caused your sudden anxiety?”
“I…ever since the pandemic disrupted my plans, I have been in this state of anxiety. I kept feeling useless. All my classmates are progressing expect me. I have nothing to show for and my life is in a mess. I am very anxious. What if I continue to be like this? What am I going to do?”
As she spoke, her eyes turned red and tears started rolling down like a broken strand of pearl necklace scattering onto the ground.
Oh dear! I am beginning to wonder if I have a tear-jerker face or a heart-tormenting voice. Why do my clients, regardless of gender and age, North South or East West, seem to cry easily when they see me?
I grabbed a piece of tissue and handed it to her.
“Ain’t I here already? You came to me for a roadmap and you are very lucky to see me so soon. Look at how precise and neat your notes are! Many of my clients aren’t even on par with you. My job today is to give you answers. If I didn’t have the confidence, I would not have taken up your request. Now that I did, that means there is still hope. If you follow my instructions, you will see things looking up very soon.”
On another occasion, a mother in her forties came to me for her son’s Bazi consultation.
As I was analysing, the mother nodded her head in agreement. The next thing I know, she started weeping loudly.
I turned to look at her husband, who had been silent all along. Did I say something wrong? And hello, your wife was crying. Why weren’t you gentleman enough to give her a tissue paper?
“I am a useless mother. I am incompetent. I do not know how to teach my son well. I love my son very much. But many times, I do not know what to do and thus I flare up at him and speak harshly. I always regret afterwards. I tried enduring but it still ends badly!”
I did not interrupt her and waited for her cries to soften, before speaking gently, “I’m here! I’m already sitting in front of you. You are looking at me now and that means help is here. You know that you are incompetent, so you went looking for solutions. That means you are willing to learn how to be a better mother!”
I handed a piece of tissue and said, “Don’t cry anymore, otherwise, other patrons will think that it’s because I refuse to lend you money.”
Since young, we have been using external possessions to define whether our lives are worth liking.
The family we are born into, our looks, health, body shape, intellect, talents, and then we move on to compare our academics, friendships, career, wealth, marriage and children.
If we are lacking in the area we covet most, we grade our lives as a failure.
I think this is the biggest problem in societal education. Our parents and teachers categorized us that way. Whether we as children are worthy of their love and bragging, depends on the few points above too.
Thus over time, we can only use the term “success” to determine whether we are of value, for some people, whether they should live on to take their next breath.
I very much prefer the definition in Buddhism. We are all Buddhas. Each and every sentient being in the six realms has a Buddha nature in them. But they got lost momentarily and fell into the endless wheel of reincarnation.
Yet, because of our Buddha nature, we have an unlimited source of potential. Every one of us has a very powerful strength inside us. It is just waiting for us to meet an accomplished teacher, so that we have the tools to explore and understand it:
And this strength that we are born with is the capital for us to transform and establish our own destiny.
If life is smooth-sailing, we would never want to leave and would mistake this mortal realm for Pureland. Thus, we all need sufferings, to realise that we should break out of this hell of a place. There has to be a better world somewhere. So how we get there?
We should, in fact, be grateful for all the setbacks and failures we have. Because it is from these sufferings, our wisdom arise:
No single Bazi is perfect. Every failure and lack we experience is the best arrangement for us, so that the heart of renunciation will arise in us and we will return to where we came from.
健康好young答案 在 絲房菜 Facebook 的最佳貼文
米媽終於開左個米媽YL GROUP俾有興趣了解多D既朋友仔~
大家有興趣就加入啦~
https://www.facebook.com/groups/siciylgroup
自從米媽決定做好Young Living之後,米媽其實好俾心機做。
唔係因為想要賺錢,而係好想透過自己識既野,經驗過既事,
當你地有問題時,米媽都可以陪著大家去搵答案,最後一步步去解決。
點解米媽咁認真?
大家都應該知道,米媽如果想賺錢既話,好多都可以做,甚至係呢個經營左12年既PAGE只賣廣告,咩牌子咩廣告都接。米媽都一定會收入唔少。 (無錯,係經營左12年,只係同大家吹水,不斷打好多字分享)
但米媽無。米媽只係一個媽媽,一個喜歡幫人喜歡分享既人,
接親既都一定係自己喜歡同中意的。
所以點解呢度仲係咁FREE,想講咩就講咩,想SHARE咩就SHARE 咩。極少廣告。
米媽好多謝米爸,佢話,呢個PAGE係俾我分享生活既地方,知道我喜歡寫文,喜歡透過分享生活而去鼓勵睇緊既人。
知道呢度係米媽生活既一部分,所以一直好支持。
到最近米媽想要將呢8年都用緊既野分享出去,米爸都好支持。
佢話,相信你會遇到好多人怕直銷會SELL人,會迫人買野,會有擔心。但我更加相信,你只會關心佢地用得好唔好,係咪真係幫到佢地。有跟你既人,一定會覺得自己無揀錯。
所以米媽決定認真地想要好好地發展Young Living, 呢一個好好發展既意思係,只要有一個人需要幫手,米媽就淨係幫果個。
跟得米媽,米媽就永遠負責到底。米媽呢個承諾其實已經包括左一切。
呢一個好好發展唔係要做得大,即使得一個都好開心。
米媽淨係想幫人。 呢個已經夠米媽開心。
因為知道,大家係因為信米媽,而選擇。
米媽亦好老實同大家講,
米媽無野比到大家,咩禮物,咩贈品,全部都無。
米媽只有一個人。
只有一個願意負責任,願意你地有問題時,開心唔開心時都陪你地,願意真心對你地好既上線。
米媽好想大家都分享到米媽呢幾個月黎既喜悅。
真心分享,真心去研究每樣產品對大家既幫助,再因為咁近距離既傾計,大家都可以拉近左距離,
最後,大家一句,多謝你,我真係好左好多。 米媽其實真係好好好開心。
其實只要成為左Young Living Member, 米媽係每個FANS都個別親自跟進,好多都成為朋友。因為你地對米媽黎講好重要,好想真係可以透過自己既分享幫到你地,或者更加CLOSE。
好喇,米媽今次開多左個FB GROUP係俾有興趣了解多D既FANS。
有咩問題都可以係入面問,米媽會定期覆大家~
大家有需要就加入啦~
https://www.facebook.com/groups/siciylgroup
#在路上我們經常遇到問題
我們都只係一個女人,有時,係真係需要有人可以傾計,可以提點,可以俾到正能量。
米媽最希望既係,可以將自己既想法,自己既樂觀,正能量影響到大家。
因為,我地都值得擁有健康快樂既身心。
共勉
#有感而發
健康好young答案 在 Facebook 的最讚貼文
YO大家好~最近發佈三條有關「無良獸醫柏雅動物診所」的黑暗內幕得到頗大迴響,其中也有些觀眾可能對當中案件有些疑問,所以在此想說明一下。
💬因為有兩個苦主的寵物都是經happy99領養再到柏雅治療,有觀眾感到懷疑happy99到底是否知情/有問題?
由於Brownie是三年前我在happy99領養的,所以我跟happy99一直保持聯繫和維持良好的關係,而今次的影片是由happy99幫忙聯絡這三位苦主出席和分享的。
在此也想幫happy99澄清一下:「happy99與柏雅動物診所從來並沒有任何利益輸送關係、沒有合約、沒有回佣。當日會選上柏雅幫忙診治救回動物的原因之一,是因為每個義工團體的資金有限,每分錢的資金都得來不易,而當日是柏雅診所主動表示願意提供「義工醫療費用的折扣優惠」給happy99帶來救助的動物。但當柏雅出現醫療事故而被happy99得知後,已即時停止將救回的貓狗放在柏雅診所,亦同時在Fb page上公布事件,奈何當時人微言輕,亦被柏雅診所的粉絲以拎唔到著數而攻擊,最後不了了之。而當日小白主人需要happy99幫助上庭作供,happy99亦義不容辭出庭,如實作供幫助小白討公道。」
對happy99的領養程序、救助動物的方式、對領養人審核的態度等我也是100%信任。正如當日Brownie的領養手續,當時除了我還有其他領養人想養Brownie的……我也是要等待審批,要排隊才能探望Brownie,努力過關才能接肥Brown回家♥️(Brownie如果被其他人領養了,大家就不能看到現在的肥Brown😂)
💬貓貓狗狗不是按體重去打針的喔,不存在「劑量過少會抗體不足、劑量過多會承受不到」,波子是不是說錯誤的資訊給觀眾?
貓狗需按體重打針,是貓苦主(GinGin主人)追查貓貓有否打針時,向獸醫查詢所得。而貓苦主的說法亦是以當日自己幫貓貓每天打FIP的針藥公式去說明的。而我是在聽到貓苦主的說話內容下,以個人的角度去表達自己意見。這一兩天貓苦主再向獸醫查証,獸醫回覆是「打疫苗是不跟體重去決定,但磅重是身體檢查非常重要一環,打針前磅重雖然不是必須、不過都重要。」
而我並不是專業獸醫,出這3條片的目的亦不是想要提供教學,所以如有任何深入的醫療問題,請向相熟的家庭動物醫生查詢喔!關於醫療的問題,請大家也不要盲目地靠在網上搜尋得到答案喔~
💬貓苦主(GinGin主人)為何不自己帶貓貓去抽血,去知道到底柏雅有沒有打針?
由於貓苦主是在追查GinGin有沒有打預防針的過程中,才發現GinGin原來有這個病「FIP, 貓傳染性腹膜炎」,FIP是貓界很嚴重的疾病、是會致命的。GinGin亦因有FIP這輩子也不可能再打任何預防計……而貓貓情緒若然十分波動,便可能會危害到身體健康,嚴重更會危害貓命!因此貓苦主不可能帶GinGin去抽血,這實在是太大風險的事了,因此才會主動向柏雅拿打針紀錄。「動物係生既,記錄係死既」,將心比己,如果作為寵物主人的你面對這樣的事,你會要愛寵冒住生命危險去抽血,而不是獸醫拿出紀錄嗎?
在發佈柏雅這三條片後,雖然有受到一些人的惡意攻擊、facebook在發佈柏雅第一條影片後其他影片更被黃標(🤣母親節很有黃標成份嗎…?)等等。但我相信公道自在人心,我波子從不後悔出這三條片去為苦主發聲!
大家仔細看完這三條影片後會知道世上原來有一間這麼黑暗的獸醫診所叫柏雅動物診所、無良醫生叫江鶴鳴(Dr.Michael)、假醫生連助護資歷都是假的「不是醫生的Dr. Ken」楊旭彤(Ken Young)… 香港保護動物或獸醫監管仍有很大的漏洞,這間診所亦有在營業,還曾改名行醫(Dr. Max)……為身邊人及自己的寵物著想,真的要認住他們…實在不想有更多無辜的寵物受害!而選擇獸醫前亦要謹慎、留意醫生(醫護人員)是否有相關履歷。
最後,有很多波友也有關心曾在柏雅做過手術的Brownie健康狀況,未來我也會帶牠去做個身體檢查,到時有報告再告訴大家,謝謝大家!❤️